Lost and Finding Joy

You want to leave now. It doesn’t matter. You want me to suffer. It doesn’t matter. You want revenge. It doesn’t matter. You go on smear campaigns. It doesn’t matter.

You’re hurting. That matters. You’ve had trauma. That matters. You’ve been wronged. That matters. You don’t know how to get out of your own way. That matters.

You don’t care about me. It doesn’t matter. You want control over me. It doesn’t matter. You attack me with words. It doesn’t matter. You take advantage of me. It doesn’t matter.

You need a soft place to fall. That matters. You need to feel secure. That matters. You need to be understood. That matters. You need help. That matters. You need to be loved. That matters.

I wanted to be your soft place to fall. It doesn’t matter. I wanted to help you feel secure. It doesn’t matter. I wanted to understand you. It doesn’t matter. I wanted to help you. It doesn’t matter. I wanted to love you. It doesn’t matter.

You beat me down. It doesn’t matter. You wanted me to feel pain. It doesn’t matter. You told me to burn in hell. It doesn’t matter.

My cup is empty. It doesn’t matter. I give up. It doesn’t matter.

It’s time to say goodbye. You matter — and so do I.